STATE FAIR: Deep-Fried Fun

I had heard that the Maryland State Fair was famous – or infamous – for its deep-fried cuisine. But I had never expected to find the wide selection that greeted me at a booth called "Deep Fried Buckeyes." 

This place takes some of the most common breakfast, lunch and dessert items from childhood and tosses them into a vat of 300-plus degree sizzling fryer oil.  

Remember the gooey, toasted Pop Tarts you scarfed down before boarding the school bus? Deep-fried.

The peanut butter and jelly sandwich your mom packed in the lunch bag? Deep-fried.

The Oreo cookies you gobbled up while procrastinating before homework? Deep-fried.

S'mores, Buckeyes, Snickers, Twinkies, Nutter Butters, Milky Ways, 3 Musketeers. Deep-fried, deep-fried, DEEP-FRIED!!! OK, you get the point.

I could no longer bear my colleague Dan Kelly's bragging about the deep-frying of what sounded like the entire snack aisle of the grocery store. Within moments we were walking – no, marching – our way down the blacktop, which felt more like the Yellow Brick Road.

In this case, the Wonderful Wizard came in the form of two men in hats, sunglasses and aprons. 

The intricacy of the description Dan and I heard on the subject of deep-fried Pop Tarts was borderline disturbing. Watch the video to hear it yourself. 

The vendor sounded more like a maitre d' of an upscale restaurant. But who was I to judge? He had tasted the forbidden fruit better known as a deep-fried, strawberry-frosted breakfast pastry while it was my first-ever visit to the Garden of Eaten.

We were told that it only takes 90 seconds from the time the candy bars and cookies are battered to the point at which they can be eaten. For Dan and me, 90 seconds felt like 40 days and 40 nights.

We could hardly contain ourselves when the fry cooks handed us our Snickers bar, Twinkie and six Oreo cookies – all topped with powdered sugar. Erik Anderson, the younger half of the booth's deep-fried duo, even urged us to top our treats with chocolate syrup. No thanks. My decadence does have limits.

For just $13 we obtained our tongue-soaking samples from the side of the booth and headed back to Patch's promotional booth at the fair.

Northern Virginia sales representative Angela Carpenter and editor Mary McGuire assisted Dan and me in completing our adventure, while my regional editor, Doug Donovan, later joined the tasting. The Oreos garnered the most positive reviews, while the Snickers bar was not far behind. The only disappointing part of the adventure was knowing we left so many treats untasted.

I ordered pizza later that night, and there is plenty left over in the fridge. I plan a return trip to the state fair this week. 

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Brad Gerick is the editor of BelAir.Patch.com, which will launch in the second week of September.

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